Another great English obituary

OBITUARY_LOGO.jpgAs noted in this earlier post, I am a big fan of the English tradition of writing lighthearted obituaries. This Daily Telegraph obit is another wonderful example of that tradition, as reflected by the opening description of the decedent, former English barrister, Peter Parkenham:

Patrick Pakenham, who has died aged 68, was a talented barrister and the second son of the 7th Earl and Countess of Longford; highly intelligent, articulate and possessed of an attractive and powerful voice, Pakenham could have attained great professional heights, but his boisterous nature and bouts of mental illness rendered it impossible for him to adhere to the routine required to sustain his position at the Bar, and he retired after 10 years’ practice.

But that overview is nothing compared to this anecdote:

During his legal career, Pakenham became something of a legend, and, 25 years on, accounts of his exploits are still current. During his appearance before an irascible and unpopular judge in a drugs case, the evidence, a bag of cannabis, was produced.
The judge, considering himself an expert on the subject, said to Pakenham, with whom he had clashed during the case: “Come on, hand the exhibit up to me quickly.” Then he proceeded to open the package. Inserting the contents in his mouth, he chewed it and announced: “Yes, yes of course that is cannabis. Where was the substance found, Mr Pakenham?”
The reply came swiftly, if inaccurately: “In the defendant’s anus, my Lord.”

Read the entire piece, as it only gets better. Hat tip to Is that Legal for the link.

Roger Clemens, medical miracle

RogerClemens9.jpgThe Stros’ Roger Clemens — certainly one of the three greatest pitchers in Major League Baseball history — turned 43 yesterday. His dominating performance this season at that advanced age for baseball pitchers prompted this Alan Schwarz/ESPN.com article on how medical advances made Clemens’ long career possible and saved Clemens from suffering the same fate as one-season wonders from previous eras, such as Mark Fidrych:

[F]or most of baseball history, a “sore arm” was like a malevolent genie who visited pitchers in the night, entered their joints and corroded their futures from the inside with no explanation or recourse. Johnny Beazley, Karl Spooner, Mark Fidrych . . . they all faded into anonymity before medicine could fix them, medicine we now take for granted. When you consider that almost every top modern pitcher has gone under the knife at some point — heck, some throw harder after ligament-transplant surgery — you realize what a lucky era we’re in.
So lucky that most people forget that Roger Clemens could have been one of those pitchers we never heard from again. It was 20 years ago that he and his throbbing shoulder lay on the operating table — before any 20-strikeout games, before any Cy Young awards and before arthroscopy was a sure thing. Before Dr. James Andrews was sure he could fix him.

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Lee Raymond announces retirement as ExxonMobil CEO

exxon.jpgExxon Mobil — the world’s largest company in terms of market capitalization — announced yesterday that chairman and CEO Lee R. Raymond, who is 66, would retire at the end of the year after 12 years on the job. As is typical of ExxonMobil’s conservative management style, the company also announced that Mr. Raymond will be repaced by native Texan, Rex W. Tillerson, who is 53 and, as ExxonMobil’s president, has been a longtime company insider being groomed to replace Mr. Raymond. Here is the company’s press release on the change, and here is an earlier post about an interesting interview with Mr. Raymond.
Mr. Tillerson — who is from Wichita Falls and is a University of Texas at Austin alum with a degree in civil engineering — has the quintessential tough act to follow. Mr. Raymond managed ExxonMobil into a more successful company in almost every respect, including the successful 1999 merger with rival Mobil Corp. Probably the biggest problem that Mr. Tillerson will face is the sheer size of the type of exploration projects in which ExxonMobil invests. Over the past decade or so, the cost of those projects — often hundreds of millions — has grown quickly as producers seek to tap formerly uneconomic reserves. As the increased price of oil justifies even larger investment, the price of those projects will likely grow into the several billions over the next decade. Laying off a large part of projects that size to hedge risk is no easy task.