Watch out for the Bears

As noted here earlier, years of mediocre football at Texas A&M has mellowed the formerly hard-knuckled 12th Man a bit. This week, A&M football team is a decided underdog to the fearsome the Baylor Bears (H/T Jay Christensen):

Meanwhile, watch out for the Houston Rockets’ mascot, Clutch the Bear:

Checking up on Krispy Kreme

The folks over at WallStrip update us on the mercurial Krispy Kreme.

Video fun

The unedited Saturday Night Live Economic Bailout News Conference Skit. Absolutely brutal, but quite funny.

The Onion News Network reports on the impact of Obama’s victory on his obsessive supporters:

Tom Alexander, R.I.P.

I lost an old friend and Houston lost one of its most colorful characters on this past Sunday morning — legendary Houston trial attorney Tom Alexander died of a heart attack at the age of 78.

The Chronicle story on Alexander’s death is here and Richard Connelly of the Houston Press chimes in here). The memorial service will be held at 11 a.m. tomorrow morning at St. Paul’s United Methodist Church, 5501 Fannin in the Museum District of Houston.

Alexander was one of Houston’s most accomplished trial lawyers, the kind of rare quick-read who could prepare for a trial by reading the case file on his way to the courthouse. Inasmuch as he had such an engaging personality, articulate delivery and quick wit, judges and jurors naturally gravitated toward him.

But Alexander was one of those larger-than-life characters who was much more than just a fine trial lawyer.

First, he was a loving husband, father and grandfather.

Alexander was also was a true sportsman who loved and supported intercollegiate and professional sports of all kinds. He loved to golf and was an original member of Champions Golf Club, where he owned a weekend cottage that allowed him to keep up with his good friend, Champions owner Jack Burke. Born and raised in Kentucky, Alexander was also an avid horseman who could handicap thoroughbreds with the best of them.

Moreover, it wasn’t all trial tactics and sports with Alexander. Whether the subject was opera, politics, philosophy, poker, theology (he gave a lay sermon at church once entitled “Can You Fistfight and Still Be a Christian?”) or simply the latest gossip in Houston’s professional community, Tom Alexander would engage and stimulate you. Perhaps not always the way you wanted, but always in a way that would make you think about the basis of your beliefs.

Alexander’s vivacious wit and personality is perhaps best summed up by one of the funniest Houston courthouse anecdotes that I’ve ever heard.

Years ago, Alexander was hired by the rich husband in an ugly divorce. The vengeful wife hired another veteran of the Houston legal community, the late Robert Scardino, Sr., the father of noted Houston criminal defense attorney, Robert Scardino, Jr.

Inasmuch as there were no children of the marriage and the value of the community estate was well-established, there was really nothing for Alexander and Scardino to fight about in the divorce.

However, the husband and wife hated each other, so they directed Alexander and Scardino to be nasty with each other for as long as possible. And these two old warhorses were happy to oblige.

After about a year or so of bickering, the family court judge tired of Alexander and Scardino fighting. So, he set the case for trial.

Realizing that there was really no reason to use precious court time to split a well-defined community estate, the family court judge called Alexander and Scardino into his chambers the morning of trial and hammered out a property settlement in an acrimonious two-hour session.

Exhausted from dealing with Alexander and Scardino, the family court judge addressed both men gratefully at the conclusion of the session:

Mr. Alexander and Mr. Scardino, thank you for working with me in settling this case and saving the court valuable time for other cases.”

“Now, the final issue is the amount of Mr. Scardino’s fee for representing the wife in this case. Mr. Scardino, what do you think is fair?”

“Well, Judge,” replied Scardino. “This has been a hard-fought case and I don’t want the amount of my fee to be the final problem in the case. So, I tell you what I’m willing to do.”

“I don’t know what the amount of Mr. Alexander’s fee has been for representing the husband in this case,” Scardino observed. “But I trust Mr. Alexander.”

“So, to put this all behind us,” offered Scardino. “Whatever Mr. Alexander’s fee has been for representing the husband in this case, I’m willing to take the same amount for representing the wife. What’s good for Mr. Alexander is fine with me.”

“Why, Mr. Scardino,” gushed the judge. “Thank you for that creative and statesmanlike approach to resolving this final issue. I really appreciate that.”

Turning toward Alexander, the judge asked: “Mr. Alexander, what do you think about Mr. Scardino’s eminently reasonable proposal?”

Alexander sat in deep thought for a moment. Then, he leaned toward Scardino, got right up in his face and — undoubtedly with a twinkle in his eye — declared:

“Why, you greedy sonuvabitch!”

Lacking appreciation for capitalism

Comedian Louis CK sums it pretty well:

What’s worse?

world_series_trophy Although not many people care much, the 2008 World Series has turned into a first rate mess.

Game Five is currently suspended while the Phillies and Rays players sit around Philadelphia waiting for the inclement weather to end. This after they nearly injured themselves while inexplicably being forced to play 5.5 innings during a driving rainstorm on Monday night. The remainder of the Game Five might be played tonight.

Moreover, Game Four began at 10 p.m. EDT because of rain most of the day on Saturday. That game finished sometime after 2 a.m. Sunday on the east coast. Not exactly the way to keep the young fans interested in the game.

Meanwhile, the umpiring in the series has been atrocious, with multiple of MLB’s supposedly best umpires blowing easy calls and routinely calling strikes on pitches that are clearly out of the strike zone.

And just to make matters utterly unbearable, Fox Sports imposes senseless announcers Joe Buck and Tim McCarver on the few folks watching on television. These two babble on endlessly describing the utterly obvious without ever saying anything remotely insightful. Often, they say things that are simply flat wrong.

singletary1 But as bad as the World Series has been, it’s nothing compared to legendary Baylor and Chicago Bears linebacker Mike Singletary’s first game this past Sunday as interim coach of the San Francisco 49’ers. Coach Singletary’s post-game performance has already become an overnight YouTube sensation and is being touted as one of the all-time great coach tirades.

AP sportswriter Greg Beacham summed up Coach Singletary’s bad first day at the office well:

Mike Singletary ended his head coaching debut by apologizing to 49ers fans above the locker room tunnel. Tight end Vernon Davis got sent to the showers like a petulant teenager, QB J.T. O’Sullivan was benched after his 11th fumble of the season, and the San Francisco defense let a 242-pound fullback catch two long touchdown passes.

Placebo Nation

In light of this NY Times article reporting that half of American doctors responding to a nationwide survey regularly prescribe placebos to their patients, I pass along the following business opportunity, courtesy of the ever-clever Dr. Boli:

placebo ad