What is in the water that big-time college football coaches are drinking this season?
First, Oklahoma State head football coach Mike Gundy went famously batshit over a newspaper article that was critical of one of his team’s professional — er. I mean, “amateur” — players.
And now Jay Christensen reports that Penn State head coach Joe Paterno is the primary suspect in a road rage incident.
It almost makes you wonder: “What would Woody Hayes do?”
Update: Paterno provides his side of the story.

(AP photo/Mike Stone)
Oklahoma 28 Texas Longhorns 21

In an entertaining revival of the Red River Rivalry (previous weekly summaries here), the Sooners (5-1) edged the Longhorns (4-2) by taking advantage of two 2nd half turnovers by Texas RB Jamaal Charles. One of Charles’ two turnovers was technically an interception, but he allowed the ball to bounce off his hands, so he should have had it. My sense is that Horns head coach Mack Brown should be about at the end of his rope with the turnover-prone Charles, who was clearly the difference between these closely-matched teams. The Horns go on the road next weekend to play Iowa State (1-5), which is coached by former Texas defensive coordinator Gene Chizik.

Houston Texans 22 Miami 19

Texans’ (3-2) kicker Kris Brown’s career day (five FG’s of 54, 43, 54, 20 and the game winner of 57) pulls out the win over Miami (0-5), which may be the NFL’s worst team. Not much to say after the Texans struggle to secure a victory at home over a winless team that was using a backup quarterback. The Texans take their non-existent running game on the road next weekend at division rival Jacksonville (3-1).

Texas Aggies 24 Oklahoma State 23

Coach Fran’s job was hanging by a thread from the top deck of Kyle Field in this one as the listless Aggies (5-1) trailed the Cowboys (3-3) 17-0 at halftime. But 275 lbs RB Jorvorskie Lane bulled in for a couple of TD’s, threw a 50 yard pass to set up another and caught a TD pass to bring the Aggies back in the second half. Despite the thrilling win, I see little that makes me believe that the Aggies will be able to slow down Texas Tech’s (5-1) high-powered offense next Saturday in Lubbock. Tech’s defense is in disarray, though, so who knows? The game at Tech begins a brutal stretch for the Ags in whcih they will play Texas Tech, Nebraska, Oklahoma and Missouri on the road as Coach Fran’s job hangs in the balance.

Alabama 30 Houston Cougars 24

The Coogs (2-3) looked dead in the water after the 1st quarter in this one, but then dominated Alabama over the final three quarters and were within a final pass play into the end zone of pulling the major upset over the Crimson Tide (4-2). The Cougars now must regroup after two straight close losses before taking on crosstown rival and well-rested Rice (1-4) at Robertson Stadium next Saturday.

Rice 31 Southern Miss 29

With just over 12 minutes left in the game, the Owls (1-4) were driving for another score while cruising with a surprising 31-7 lead over the Eagles (2-3). But then, the Owls missed a chip shot FG and less than ten minutes later, they had to stop a two-point conversion to salvage the win. The Owls take on Houston (2-3) Saturday at Robertson Stadium in their annual crosstown rivalry.

It’s the annual Texas-OU Weekend in Dallas and with two straight Red River rivalry victories under their belt, one would think that the Texas Longhorns would be feeling reasonably confident coming into this year’s game.
Don’t count on it.
As noted in last week’s local football report, the Horns were manhandled by Kansas State at home after looking unimpressive through the first four games of the season. The loss hurled the Horns out of the Top 10 of the polls, although UT did retain a spot in at least this Top 10 poll.
Meanwhile, Longhorn fan Ida Mae Crimpton reports from her front porch in Elgin that all is not well in the Longhorn nation after the Kansas State debacle:

Well, things were so bad after last weekend’s loss to Kansas State that Mack didn’t even come out of his office to talk with the team after the game was over. So defensive coordinator Duane Akina took over for him. Coach Akina told the guys he was real proud of them except for “that first quarter Kansas State touchdown pass that Marcus (Griffin) should have stoppedÖand that 41 yard interception return for a touchdown that anybody on offense could have preventedÖand the 85 yard kick return that the punter should have stoppedÖand the 89 yard punt return that my grandmother could have stoppedÖand the 2 yard touchdown run in the fourth quarterÖand, oh yeah, those two field goals that nobody even tried to blockÖ” Then, I guess the lecture sort of snowballed because you could tell coach Akina was getting madder and madder because that knobby fat area on the back of his neck was swelling up and getting real red.
Then he asked Colt if he planned to play professional sports after graduation and when Colt said “yeah” coach Akina suggested that he might consider women’s professional soccer. Next, he turned to Jamaal who had been fiddling with his cell phone and asked him if he was having any personal problems or trouble with his studies (which brought a few snickers from the back of the teamÖ). Jamaal said “no sir” so coach Akina asked him why he was running like he was wearing flip-flops? At that point coach Akina asked if coach Davis had anything he’d like to say to the team, but he said he didn’t, or at least that’s what he might have said because it was hard to hear him over the sobbing coming from behind Mack’s office door.

Could all of this augur for a return to the days of Mack Brown’s Stoops Curse?
Tune in tomorrow at 2:30 p.m., CDT on ABC to find out.

Big-time college football is big business. Maybe not as big business as the NFL, but definitely big enough that major universities really ought to dump the obsolescent and hypocritical NCAA regulatory system and form a for-profit system that would pay players market-based compensation similar to minor league baseball.
That such reform makes sense is underscored by the first part of a two part Austin-American Statesman series on the University of Texas athletic department’s finances. Not only has the $100 million UT athletic department budget doubled in the past six years, athletics expenses at UT have grown twice as fast as the universityís overall spending during the same time frame.
Moreover, because of the NCAA’s regulation of player compensation, UT (as with other big-time programs) funnels compensation to players in the form of “resort privileges.” For example, just since UT’s football team won the national title in 2005, the football program has spent more than $200,000 renovating its playersí lounge and $155,000 purchasing a hydrotherapy room to help soothe its playersí sore limbs. That hydrotherapy room probably came in handy for Texas QB Colt McCoy after the licking he took during the Longhorns 41-21 loss to Kansas State last Saturday.
Likewise, the amount of money the university spends per athletehas almost doubled over the past four years, from $113,000 in 2003 to $210,000 this year. Thatís 10 times the average of all Division I and II colleges, and eight times what UT spends educating each of its non-athlete students. When questioned about that discrepancy, the UT athletic department’s CFO replied that the difference is largely meaningless because of the self-supporting nature of the UT athletic program. ìWe eat what we kill,î the CFO told the Statesman.
Which reminds me of the thought that I had when I saw the now popular video of Oklahoma State head coach Mike Gundy going batshit at a newspaper reporter over an article that she had written that was critical of one of his players. Gundy wasn’t wrong in going haywire. He simply went wacko at the wrong target. The target should have the feckless university leaders who perpetuate the facade of intercollegiate football at the expense of the players. It’s high time that the universities engaging in big-time college football start treating it for what it really is — a big business that should pay market compensation to the professional athletes who are responsible for generating most of the income for the enterprise.

As noted in the weekly football report, the water cooler conversation in these psrts over the past several days has inevitably turned to what on earth was embattled Texas A&M head coach Dennis Franchione thinking when he sold a secret newsletter entitled “VIP Connection” to a dozen or so wealthy Aggies for $1,200 a pop (Franchione rakes in over $2 million annually).
The Dallas Morning News’ Brian Davis came up with a few of the newsletters and passes along some of their content:

The Dallas Morning News obtained several “VIP” newsletters written by McKenzie since December 2004. Most have a positive tone. . . . others talk about what plays A&M will run, the team’s travel schedule and generally harmless fluff. [. . .]
Last November, [the newsletter] outlined A&M’s game plan prior to the Texas game. The Aggies wanted to take shots deep, use gadget plays and “hardball running plays.”
“Lane on power, and then [Mike] Goodson on a zone read that goes toward a different place in the defensive set than usual [they’ve never seen it run this way].”

And people wonder why A&M’s offense lacks imagination? ;^)
Update: The DMN provides even more from the newsletters.
And Ray Melick makes a good point at the end of this column:

[W]hen the guys who were once willing to buy everything you were selling, including your secret newsletter at $1,200 a year, begin to turn on you.
It’s usually a pretty good indication that it’s time to start looking for a comfortable place to fall.

(AP Photo/John Amise)(previous weekly summaries here)
Falcons 26 Texans 16

Don’t christen Gary Kubiak as the next great NFL coach just yet.
After a sprightly start of the season, the Texans (2-2) lost to a mediocre Atlanta (1-3) team that is precisely the type of team that the Texans have to be beat in order to become an average NFL team, much less a good one. Although you won’t hear it much from local media that covers the team, the Texans continue to have huge problems, particularly on offense where their best WR (Andre Johnson) is hurt and the “rushing” attack (more like a walking attack) revolves around two over-the-hill and oft-injured RB’s and a mediocre offensive line. Meanwhile, the defense, while improving, still has gaping holes in the secondary and remains inconsistent in putting heat on the opposing team’s QB. The Texans take on a bad Miami Dolphins (0-4) team next Sunday at Reliant Stadium. Don’t be surprised if the Texans serve up the Dolphins’ first victory of the season.

Kansas State 41 Texas Longhorns 21

The shallowness of the Longhorns’ (4-1/0-1) undefeated record was exposed with a bang in Austin as Kansas State (3-1/1-0) took advantage of two kick returns for touchdowns and four interceptions by Colt McCoy to cruise to an easy 41-21 victory. It was the worst home loss for the Horns in 10 years under coach Mack Brown. Texas as the Wildcats pummelled McCoy with multiple blitz packages that the Horns’ offensive line rarely picked up. The Horns — who have been susceptible to blitz packages during the Brown era except for the 2005 National Championship team led by the elusive QB Vince Young — now must figure out quickly how to overcome an even better blitzing team in Oklahoma (4-1/0-1) next weekend in Dallas or else UT will be facing the daunting prospect of an 0-2 start in Big 12 conference play.

Texas Aggies 34 Baylor 10

The Aggie nation heaved a huge sigh of relief as the Ags (4-1/1-0) methodically pounded the Bears (3-2/0-1) into submission at College Station. After last week’s debacle at South Beach and this week’s revelations of Coach Fran’s stupefyingly stupid secret newsletter, a loss against the Bears could well have prompted the type of meltdown in Aggieland not seen since the infamous firing of Aggie head coach Emory Bellard back in 1978. The Ags used their tried and true ball-control offense to overwhelm the Bears, but it remains to be seen whether the Aggies can consistently beat teams with equal or better personnel while playing offense in a phone booth. The Aggies host resurgent Oklahoma State (3-2/1-0) for first place in the Big 12 South (first place in the Big 12 South is on the line next week at Kyle Field, not the Cotton Bowl?!) before their high-anxiety trip to the plains to meet Tech (4-1/0-1) in two weeks.

East Carolina 37 Houston Cougars 35

The Coogs (3-2/1-1) had their annual shoot-self-in-the-foot game when an awful kicking game and poor run defense combined to allow a mediocre East Carolina (2-3/1-0) to pull out the close win at Robertson Stadium. The Coogs now must travel to face a tough game next Saturday at Alabama (3-2) before returning home in two weeks for their annual crosstown rivalry game with Rice (0-4).

The Rice Owls (0-4) were idle this past weekend, but play Southern Miss (2-2) in a rare Wednesday night game this week before returning home to face Houston on October 13.

I used to think that former Texans QB David Carr is a nice fellow who just doesn’t have the gumption to be a top-flight NFL QB. But now I’m wondering if he is simply a nice fellow who isn’t very bright.
This earlier post chronicled the increasingly testy exchanges between Carr and his former teammates after the Texan’s unceremonious canning of Carr last summer. Carr followed those brickbats up with the following recent observations reported in John McClain’s Sunday NFL Notebook:

David Carr is starting his first game for Carolina today. After coming off the bench to help Carolina defeat Atlanta last week, Carr replaces quarterback Jake Delhomme, who has a strained right elbow and missed practice last week, against visiting Tampa Bay.
“Honestly, I do feel better on this team,” Carr said comparing the Panthers to the Texans. “I’m more relaxed. I’m not being pressed to do things I don’t need to be doing.
“I feel like I can go out with my mechanics and all that and just throwing the football in general, I feel like that just comes naturally, and I don’t have to think about it. That’s freeing as far as playing quarterback. Now, it’s just completing balls and throwing to the right guy.”

Carr’s stat line for yesterday’s game against Tampa Bay: 10-41 for 137 net yards passing, 1 TD and 1 interception.
Just comes naturally, I guess.

As soon as I acknowledge one of Chronicle NFL columnist John McClain’s rare good columns in the previous post, he serves this blog post entitled “Texans should be embarrassed after 26-16 defeat” in response to the Texans’ loss yesterday at Atlanta.
Embarrassing? McClain thinks that the Texans’ performance was embarrassing? How about this performance? Or this one?
And for more Chronicle sunshine reporting, compare this Richard Justice puff piece from today’s paper with this one during the latter stages of the Texans’ disastrous 2-14 seasons in 2005.
Now, that is embarrassing!

I am a frequent critic of Chronicle NFL sports columinst John McClain’s seemingly endless cheerleading for the Texans. But McClain is still capable of writing a good column on occasion, such as this recent one on the colorful fights over the year between various local coaches and players, on one hand, and local sportswriters, on the other. Why can’t he write this way about the Texans?