The Onion includes several Texas-related entries in its satirical end-of-the-year list of the top sports stories of 2005:

Apr. 5óThe Baylor women’s basketball team defeats Michigan State to win the NCAA women’s championship, showing the nation and their own university what a Baylor team can do when it works hard, plays as a team, and does not conspire to murder one another.
Dec. 11óThe Houston Texans, searching desperately for a way to improve and threatened by the potential for awfulness displayed by the Green Bay Packers, voluntarily forfeit the remainder of the 2005 season in order to draft Heisman Trophy-winning running back Reggie Bush of USC.
Dec. 12óUSC Trojans running back Reggie Bush announces that he has done much soul-searching and has decided to stay in school in order to complete his college degree, lead the Trojans to another national championship, and avoid playing for the Houston Texans.

Ouch! And while on the subject of tough football seasons, this Ebay seller’s idea — if successful — could generate a flood of similar offers from Houston Texan fans. 12/28/05 Update: And here is the rest of the story.